Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
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