This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
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