i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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