IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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