The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
