So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
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