I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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