Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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