dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
It was a blind-side dick pic.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
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