i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
someone owes me an orgasm
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Alive.
So much puke
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
