apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize