We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
