I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
