Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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