whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
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If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
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