I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
