Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
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