i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize