come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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