How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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