Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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