She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
