No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize