You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
