I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
