Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
