i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
