i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
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