I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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