He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
