whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
