Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
