she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Still dying that you shit outside
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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