I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize
