Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
We have started to decorate penises.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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