3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
