yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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