I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
