Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
