Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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