He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize