I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Randomize
