i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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