I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
