I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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