Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
