So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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