Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize