I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
