yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
